


and then silence

by TackyPenguin



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: (or not; you decide), Character Death, Force Ghost Qui-Gon Jinn, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Suicide, Tatooine, the character death is not exactly explicit? but it’s definitely heavily implied so
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-20
Updated: 2017-12-20
Packaged: 2019-02-17 17:56:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13082208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TackyPenguin/pseuds/TackyPenguin
Summary: A man walks out into the desert.An AU coda to Revenge of the Sith.





	and then silence

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve been working on this since April, I think, off and on? I can’t really tell any more whether it’s any good, so at any rate here you go!

The second sun is sinking toward the horizon as Owen heads back into the Lars compound. He and Beru suddenly have a child. Though it's like an answer to their prayers, it’s admittedly a somewhat more immediate answer than they were prepared for. A supply run to Anchorhead will have to wait until morning, but he can at least do a little basic childproofing before they bring their baby ( _their baby!_ ) inside.

Beru, still standing outside, cradles the infant in her arms. She tears her attention away from her new charge and back to the Jedi who delivered him. “But what will you do?” she asks him, shifting Luke gently.

Obi-Wan can't quite bear to meet her eyes. He doesn't think he can stomach the idea of looking anyone in the eyes right now, really. “I’m leaving,” he says quietly, addressing the words to the swaddled baby instead. The baby isn't looking at him. The baby is sleeping peacefully.

“You're certain you won't stay with us a while?” Her voice seems to hold more concern than he deserves.

He shakes his head. “No,” he whispers. “I cannot stay.” It's true enough, he thinks, even if he suspects he might be misleading her to the impression that he has important business elsewhere.

He does not have important business elsewhere. He watches her retreating form, safe from her gaze now that she has turned her back to him, until she disappears after her husband into their compound.

Obi-Wan glances over at the speeder he arrived on. Owen and Beru will find it in the morning. It's not fancy, but it's in good repair, and should last them for a long time. They'll certainly get more use out of it than he will, he muses. Then he turns away from both the speeder and the compound.

With calm, measured steps, he walks out into the desert.

He walks for hours, his pace unhurried, his footprints swallowed up behind him by the shifting sand. One by one the triple moons rise, climbing higher into the sky and lighting his way. He half-expects to encounter hostile Tusken raiders, or perhaps a krayt dragon - he has certainly heard enough stories from Anakin over the years about the dangers of Tatooine’s deserts at night - but he meets nothing and no one.

The moons set, and he continues onward as the twin suns rise once again to replace them in the sky. The sand begins to bake in the heat of the day, and his steps grow unsteady as the temperature rises. Dimly, he registers tears rolling down his cheeks. It's foolishness to weep in a desert, he knows, but he supposes it's not as though that really matters at this point.

He pauses at the top ridge of a dune to catch his breath, which is starting to grow short. He crouches down, panting, feeling the sweat trickle down his back under the heavy layers of his tunics. The air, dry as it is, feels heavy and oppressive. He drops to his knees and curls over, dragging breath after breath into his lungs, fighting against sobs that won't stop welling up.

The world swims as he finally drags himself back to his feet. He blinks the haze from his vision, then startles and nearly loses his balance when an impossible voice suddenly cuts through the muted whisper of the desert.

 _Oh, my padawan_. Qui-Gon’s form shimmers, wavering like a mirage in the heat, and reaches out towards Obi-Wan with pleading hands. Obi-Wan stares. Oh, good, he thinks, now he’s hallucinating.

 _Padawan_ , Qui-Gon seems to say again. Obi-Wan scoffs. No. He is not interested in discussing padawans. Not today, possibly not ever, and definitely not with the hallucination of his old master. Resolving firmly to ignore this figment of his cruel imagination, he turns and stumbles down the other side of the dune as quickly as he can.

He keeps up his rapid pace for as long as he can manage, pressing on until dusk is falling once more. How long is a Tatooine day, anyway, he wonders? He can’t seem to remember, although he thinks he used to know. With every step his head aches, throbbing behind his eyes as he weaves unsteadily through increasingly rocky terrain.

It’s fully dark, before any of the moons have risen, when he finally gets too dizzy to balance. He doesn’t seem to be sweating any more, which is faintly a relief, as he no longer has to expend the effort to wipe the sweat out of his eyes. He slumps against one of the now ubiquitous outcroppings of rock, sliding down it until he’s kneeling on the ground in as close an approximation of proper meditative posture as he can manage. He takes a moment to try and control his breathing, with only moderate success. His heart, fluttering in his ribcage, altogether refuses to be calmed.

Reverently, he unclips his lightsaber from his belt and lays it down on the sand before him, an offering to the unyielding desert around him. Then he leans back against the rock, unable to hold himself upright under his own strength any more. He closes his eyes, and waits to die.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments appreciated as always!


End file.
